A Tale of Two Brothers
by PoeteMaudit42
Summary: Zeus decides to teach two of his sons a lesson by giving them a new perspective. A/X, slight G/I
1. Two Brothers

A Tale of Two Brothers

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, just playing with them and then putting them back where I found them.

Spoiler Alerts: There are references to many episodes in the story, most notably Xena's Intimate Strangers and Ten Little Warlords. If I think of any other episodes that may have been necessary to know about, I will update this spoiler alert or post it at the beginning of that chapter. If you haven't seen them, you can get an episode synopsis at /epguide/epguide.html .

There was a thunderous bang that echoed in the main hall of the god of war's temple. The two brothers came to a sudden break in their fighting, looking for the source of the noise. They didn't have to look long as a golden flash hailed the arrival of the king of the gods.

"Enough!" exclaimed Zeus. "You two boys are going to stop this nonsense. I can't keep butting in on your brawls. What will it take to make you learn?"

The two sons of Zeus stood there dumbstruck. Ares and Hercules looked from each other to their father. Neither of them said a thing. After a moment of silence, Ares composed himself and addressed their father. "And why, may I ask, did you choose to grace us with your presence? Jerkules and I were almost done working out an issue…"

"Yes, I saw your 'efforts.' Why is it that you two could never find common ground?" asked an exasperated Zeus. "I can not let one of my sons perish because of the pride of another."

"Pride? You think this is over pride?," Hercules glared angrily at his father. "This is NOT about pride. This is about a manipulative, sadistic…"

"Yea, yea.. no need to flatter me, brother dear," Ares said with a sneer, and smugly cut him off. "So what's your point, dad? You worried that I was finally going to off your favorite?"

Zeus just stood watching his sons with a wary look on his face. As he looked back in forth between them, an idea struck him like a bolt of lightning. A grin grew on his face slowly, menacingly. His sons did not like it one bit. "A lesson…. Yes, a lesson." He smiled at his own brilliance. He held his and out into the air and a small orb began to form in his palm. He closed his eyes and the orb began to grow larger. It was glowing bright yellow and orange. Hercules and Ares looked at each other and began to back away from each other, Zeus and the orb. Zeus had a look of stern concentration on his face. He opened his eyes to reveal his own eyes now matched the color now of the ever growing globe. His whole body seemed to be becoming enveloped in the yellow orange glow. Ares and Hercules began to run for the nearest exit, but it was too late. Zeus let out a yell as the power surged through him. Ares and Hercules found themselves unable to run, they were being pulled back into the orb. With a final surge from Zeus, it picked the god and demi-god and sent them hurtling backwards to the orb. They crashed into it and each other and fell to the ground in an unceremonious lump.

"NO!" came a cry from the temple entrance. "Hercules!"

Zeus looked up to see Hercules's best friend Iolaus running in. "What have you done?" cried the golden hunter. He ran to the slumped over body of his friend.

"They had to be taught a lesson. This is not appropriate behavior for two men of their status," said Zeus in a matter of fact manner. Hercules began to stir as Iolaus tried to help prop him up.

"Get off of me.." warned a very hazy and disgruntled demi-god. "Eck, blondie. don't touch me." He forced himself up off the ground without any further help from Iolaus. "Gods, my head is spinning…" As he stood he saw the still slumped over body of the god of war. His eyes grew wide as he the most recent events came back to his memory. '_No, no, no… surely not…'_ he ran to the nearest shield hanging up on the wall. He looked at the reflection, his heart pounding in his chest. "Jerkules? NO! Zeus!" He turned to address his father to watch him disappear in a flash of gold with the body of Ares. "Oh you have got to be kidding me."

"Herc, what's going on here?" Iolaus asked, the confusion easily discernable on his face.

"I am NOT Jerkules." He glowered at the sidekick.

"What?" Iolaus looked shocked. "But.. wait.. what? If you're not, who are you?" He paused and his eyes got wide with worry. "The Sovereign! I won't let you get away with this!" Iolaus assumed a fighting stance.

"What?" It was now Ares turn to look confused. "What about any of this makes you think I'm the Sovereign." He looked at Iolaus's fighting stance. "And oh come on.. really? Do you think you can take me on without your little buddy?" Ares rolled his eyes, and then a more serious look took over. He looked up at the ceiling of his temple. "Think this is so funny, don't you, old man! GIVE ME BACK MY BODY AND MY GODHOOD!" There was no response, but Ares knew the message was heard. _'Damn the old man, damn Hercules, and just well, damn. Well now what?' _His brain struggled to comprehend all that had just happened._ 'Come on Ares, what's next?'_ A smile crossed his face as a plan came to him. He moved to step around Iolaus and head out his temple door to start on his journey. Iolaus jumped in his way, blocking his exit. "MOVE," he said with a dark growl.

"What and let you go out and tarnish the name of my best friend? Not in this lifetime, pal." Iolaus stood firm in front of him.

"Get out of my way, or my leaving this temple won't be IN your lifetime."

Iolaus shuddered under the threat of the former war god. It was a strange phenomenon, seeing your worst enemy in the body of your best friend. For all of Hercules's features, his eyes and demeanor were all Ares.

Ares pushed past Iolaus and strode angrily out the door. '_Hm… let's see. We're in..'_ He looked around the outside of his temple. '_Er… Laoss?' _ He saw a familiar statue in the courtyard and smiled. '_Yes. Laoss. Now, Athens, that's about a day's walk..'_ His thoughts were interrupted by the golden hunter.

"What are you doing?" Iolaus followed him outside. He could have swore that Ares was planning on going somewhere. He inwardly scoffed at the idea. '_Ares try and rough it as a moral. HA!' _ The body of his best friend turned to face him.

"I'm going somewhere. Do NOT follow me." Ares tried to give Iolaus his most menacing look, though he was sure the effect was lost given his current condition.

"Woah. So maybe I can't hold you hostage in your temple, but you are not going anywhere unsupervised. People need to be told you are a danger." Iolaus tried to look firm in his decision to follow the dangerous former god.

Ares sneered at him. "Whatever." With that, he turned and walked out of the village and headed to Athens.

Iolaus gave him a dirty look of his own then took off after him, trying to catch up.

Hercules opened his eyes. His hand immediately sought out his head to stop the spinning sensation. "Ugh. I feel like I got kicked in the head by a centaur." He tried to rite himself from his horizontal position. "Huh?" He looked around. He was lying on a couch—a black leather couch. He looked around the room he was in. It was a large palatial suite with a large four-post bed, draped in black silk. The couch he was on was by a large fireplace containing a cheery little fire. He could see from his seat a large window covered in thick black curtains. When he felt like his head wasn't spinning as much, he stood up and walked to the window. Pushing aside the curtains he found himself over looking a fort, located somewhere high up in the mountains. "Where am I? What's going on?" He asked himself.

"Oh good! You're finally awake!" The bubbly voice startled Hercules as he looked over to see his sister shrouded in a residual burst of pink.

"Dite? What is going on? Where am I?" Hercules tried to remember what had happened last to him.

"You're in Ares fort near mount aetna." She smiled warmly and walked forward to hug him. "Oh bro, I'm so glad you're awake. You were totally worrying me there! I mean, you'd been out for like 3 hours! Just laying there.."

"Ok, I get it Dite, but how'd I get this way? What am I doing at Ares's temple?" Hercules put his hands on his sister's shoulders trying to make eye contact and get her to focus.

"Er, well.. that's complicated. You see, dad decided that you and Ar needed to have a lesson," as she said it her sweet smiles faded to a wince. "And, like, because you two don't understand each other, he thought it would be a good deal for you to walk a mile in each other's boots so to speak."

"What do you mean 'So to speak?'" asked Hercules, trying to get the point out of his ditzy sister.

"Well, I mean, he didn't just mean boots. See for yourself." Aphrodite held out her hand and a mirror appeared in it, for Hercules to take.

Hercules took the mirror tentatively from the love goddess. Judging from the wince still apparent on her face, he wasn't going to like what he saw. He looked down into the mirror. He face lost color. His head began to spin again. "ZEUS!"

"I know, right? Yea, you can yell all you want, but he said he won't talk to you until you calm down. So, yea, pretty gnarly, huh?" Aphrodite shook her head. "Oh well, until he decides to reverse it or you find a loop hole, you have to just deal."

"Deal with it? Are you out of your mind! I'm stuck in Ares's body and for all I know he is gallivanting around Greece ruining everything I fought to protect under MY NAME!" Hercules was seething with anger.

"Woah. Don't even take that attitude with me. I do not have to be here trying to help you wise up and get this thing over and done with, but I am. So yea, when you are done with this 'tude you just let me know." Aphrodite crossed her arms across her chest and was about to step back into the aether when Hercules's apology stopped her.

"I'm sorry. I know… look, I know it's not your fault, and thank you for coming here. I know you don't have to and right now, I know I need all the help I can get. " The new god of war gave his sister a sorrowful look. Aphrodite smiled sincerely.

"Oh, Herc! I can't stay mad at you. Well, now that you are war, it's time to explore your domain." As Aphrodite grabbed his hand, Hercules spared one last glance at the mirror still in his hand before she pulled him into the aether with her. He could have swore his reflection was glaring at him.


	2. First Steps

First steps…

Iolaus was drenched in sweat trying to match the pace of Ares. They had been walking like this for 4 hours and it was wearing him down. "Come on Ares, look, why don't we just slow down and start setting up camp for the night."

For the first time since they left Laoss, Ares turned and looked at his brother's sidekick. "Look, I don't know what kind of operation you think this is, but I never said we were traveling together. You have just been stalking me from the moment I left the temple. You are welcome to set up camp whenever, wherever so long as it does not interfere with my plans."

Iolaus grabbed hold of the demi-god's arm. "Ares, ya know, Hercules isn't a full god. Even he can't keep up this pace forever. His body needs rest and food before it can continue on. Be reasonable!"

"Reasonable? Only a couple of hours ago, you and your friend stormed into MY temple to tell ME what a terrible ingrate I was. And now you want me to buddy up to you even though until you became winded, you wouldn't stop flappin' your jaw about all the terrible stuff I had planned, and how I was going to get what was coming to me."

Iolaus hated it when Ares was right. Why should Ares make peace with him? "Ok, ok, let's just make a treaty for now. What do you say, huh? I mean, come on, its not like you know how to do this whole mortal thing. I mean, cooking, hunting, starting a fire…"

"For your information, I happen to know all those things fine. This is not my first time as a mortal and I do not need your help." Ares continued walking down the path.

"Wait, Ares, come on." The former war god ignored him. Iolaus jogged to catch up. "Ya know, you catch more flies with honey then vinegar!" Iolaus caught up to him.

"You mortals. Gah. I would have thought by now you'd understand that the point is to keep flies away from yourself by now. I don't know how you mortals think you are so much smarter than us." Ares rolled his eyes.

"Look, come on, stop. I mean it, it's about to be sunset and you'll regret it if you don't stop now." Iolaus pleaded with him. '_I can't believe I'm actually trying to get Ares to be my company. As annoying as he is, I need to keep him close enough to keep an eye on him. Friends close, enemies closer.'_

Ares stopped. He gave Iolaus a very suspicious, thorough look over. "What's the catch?"

"No catch. Just a mutually beneficial treaty. You don't starve to death and I get the security of knowing where you are." Iolaus flashed him his most winning grin.

Ares stuck his hand out as an offering for Iolaus. "You've got yourself a deal."

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Hercules found that Aphrodite had teleported them both to Olympus—more precisely, the throne room on Olympus where Zeus sat waiting. "Welcome my son, I have been expecting you." Zeus stood from his throne and walked over to greet Hercules and Aphrodite. "Thank you, sweat pea, for looking after my boy here."

"No prob, dad." She winked at her father and said, "Well, I think dad here can fill ya in on anything you'd need to know. So, I'm off to Naxos to check on my new temple. Tootles!" In a flash of pink she was gone.

"Well, son, I know you disagree with my methods, but I think you'll find this to be an eye-opening experience. Being the god of war is not as easy as it sounds, nor is it all it's cracked up to be. Your brother Ares, while rebellious, is a perfect candidate for the job. While you disagree with what he does, you both have a similar goal. In fact, all the fighting that you do for him, actually feeds his power. You see, he is not an evil character; he represents both sides in a war. Anyway, I digress. We need to discuss you and what you will be doing until you are relieved of this duty."

Zeus took his son and led him into the Olympian library to explain all of the duties he must fulfill. Hercules sighed, _'This is going to be a long day._'

Many hours had passed on Olympus when Zeus and Hercules emerged from their lesson. Zeus looked at his Hercules and smiled. "As soon as you leave this hall, you will be endowed with the full powers of war." He held for Hercules the sword of Ares. "Now take this." Hercules took the offered sword. "Oh, and one last thing, don't forget to look after your chosen. Your chosen is one of you highest responsibilities. Now go, and be strong Hercules."

Hercules gave Zeus a puzzled look. "Wait, what's a chosen? How do I know what to do?"

Zeus grinned. "I have faith, you'll figure it out. Goodbye son." With that, Zeus waved his hand and teleported Hercules back to the halls of war, were he would start his reign.

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Back at the campsite, Ares and Iolaus sat around a small fire eating the bounty from Iolaus's hunt. Ares wasn't thrilled with his quail, but he sure wasn't going to let it go to waste. The awkward silence was stifling. Even though they had called a temporary truce, the two of them couldn't help but sit there and size each other up.

"So.." Iolaus started, "Any clue as to where we are heading?"

Ares grinned. "Yep."

"Care to fill me in on that?" The hunter questioned.

"Nope," came the flat response.

"Well, are we going to a place or are we going to a someone or someone's?" The hunter asked, growing irritated.

"I am going to see a friend." Ares stated. His voice did not show any emotion to hint as to what kind of friend.

Iolaus tilted his head in thought. '_What kind of friend would Ares have that he would trust with such a secret?'_ He tried again, "What kind of friend is this? Surely you are not counting on some warlord, because you know they only work for you when you can provide them with favors."

"Don't worry, not a warlord, just a old dear friend."

Iolaus gave him a suspicious look. "Is this the friend that you were mortal with the first time?"

Ares glared at Iolaus. "Maybe." He trailed off in thought. "I think I'm going to bed." With that he lay down, and pretended not to notice Iolaus any more that night.

Iolaus watched the former god, '_Hercules, if you can hear me, I hope your doing a lot better job than HE ever did. We'll get this taken care of soon, I promise.'_

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Deep within the halls of war, Hercules heard the silent prayer of his friend and wished he could go to him. Hercules knew however that whatever he was supposed to be learning or doing would be slowed down by furthering a fight with Ares. As he leaned back in his newly acquired throne, another voice joined him in his mind. He closed his eyes and tried to focus on the voice, to hear what it was saying. "Where are you?" the voice asked. The voice was strong and intoxicating, he wanted to find the source. He thought about the source and stepped into the aether, hoping to find the source.

'_Xena?'_


	3. Commonalities

Chapter 3: Commonality

Chapter 3: Commonality

Xena walked stealthily among the dense foliage. _"Where are you?" _The ever-present question rang in her mind. "Here kitty, kitty," she said as she silently cursed how she had gotten suckered into this. She muttered some profanities as she stumbled over a vine in her path. _"Where are you… stupid cat… how far could you have gotten?"_ Xena called out for the lost cat again. _"Had to stop in town to look for a blacksmith…" _she scowled to herself. Now we should be running late on her way to Corinth to meet Gabrielle. She grumbled again before calling out sweetly "Come on out now, come on kitty." Xena thought back to the earlier events of the day, what a simple day it had been. Fight a bandit here, save a woman and child later.. oh and then get talked into finding said child's frightened cat. Xena stood up tall and temporarily stopped her search. She felt something; a tingle ran through her body telling her someone was there. At first thought she was sure it was Ares, but something was different. "_No, it definitely isn't Ares," _she thought to herself. As quickly as the sensation began it ended, leaving her along again in the woods looking for the lost cat. Xena took another step further and heard a rustling in the trees above her. "Kitty?" she said, hoping there was no one else around to here her say that. In response there was a loud mew. Xena smiled, looked high up in the tree and saw were the cat was perched. Taking aim, she smiled as she let her chakram fly up into the night sky, severing the branch and sending the cat racing down the side of the tree. As it bolted down the trunk, Xena deftly caught it by the scruff of its neck. Holding it at arms length in her right hand, she held out her left and caught her chakram on its return trip. The cat let out a final mew in its struggle to flee, and calmed down so that the warrior could hold it closer to her. Xena sighed to herself. At least Gabrielle wasn't there to see the search and rescue for the cat. _"Gods know what she would have written in her scrolls about this."_

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Hercules shook his head. He didn't understand this one at all. _"How could I have heard her thoughts? Why did it draw me to her?" _Hercules paced around the Halls of War. He had always admired the warrior, well, since she had stopped trying to kill him, that is. He paced some more. _"How did she know I was there?" _He was baffled by all of this. _"Maybe I should have appeared and talked to her about it."_ He groaned at the thought of explaining all of this. _"No, she doesn't need to get involved. Poor Xena, gods know my family has put her through enough because of me."_ In the back of his mind though, he knew there was another reason he didn't stop to talk to her. He tried to shut the thoughts out, but they kept creeping back in. _"What if she defends Ares? They have always had a weird …" _his mind trailed off. What did they have that was weird? A relationship? Hercules laughed in spite of himself. He knew deep down that there was a soft spot in the warrior princess for the war god. He tried not to dwell on it though. Other thoughts floated into his mind, such as having to admit his own arrogance to the dark warrioress. He knew he was stubborn and that it annoyed Xena to no end when the brothers got into it. But still, how had he heard her thoughts? He wanted answers. "Aphrodite!" His voice echoed in the marble halls of war.

In a brilliant flash of pink sparkles, Hercules's scantily clad sister appeared. "Ya know, that's not attractive when Ar does that either. If you needed to talk to me, you could have just called my name." She crossed her arms across her chest and gave him her patented glare.

Hercules rolled his eyes. "Look, I'm sorry…" and before he could finish his apology, the blonde bubbly goddess said, "Ok, ok.." and Hercules could tell that all was forgiven. He smiled a genuine smile at his sister. "So I had a question for you…" Hercules started.

"Alright, shoot," Aphrodite said, as she made her way to sit on Ares's throne. She climbed atop the large black chair and then turned her attention to her brother in need.

"It's about... someone... I could hear their thoughts in my head. What does that mean?"

Aphrodite tilted her pretty head, "Well, it could have been just a prayer to you."

"No, it wasn't a prayer. It was just, I don't know, overwhelming my thoughts, but this person's thoughts had nothing to do with me or war."

Aphrodite smiled, "So, you heard Xena, huh?"

"What? How did you?" Hercules stammered.

"Duh. Of course you are going to here her. She is Ares's chosen, which temporarily makes her your chosen. And no, you won't here her all the time, just occasionally, unless she is in dire need."

"But, why is she his chosen? I thought that meant she had to serve him. Last time I checked, she was kicking his butt all over Greece!" Hercules looked stunned.

"Did you ever stop to wonder how a mortal could put up such a strong fight against a full fledged Olympian? Pfft, I mean, come on, she's good, but to beat up one of the twelve? As if." The love goddess shrugged her delicate shoulders. "So, we done here?"

"Err… I guess.." Hercules was still lost in thought. _"How could this happen? Why would Xena have agreed to this? And what did she mean by that last statement. How could answering one question bring up so many others? _

Aphrodite watched him, silently contemplating the inner struggle that Hercules must be facing. _Must be hard finding out someone you care about so much is tied to your archenemy. Oh well, he was bound to learn sometime. Oh man, it's about time for the waves to break at Dellos. _She smiled inwardly. "Ok bro, its time for me to head. Tootles!" Before Hercules could react, she disappeared as she had come in, in a shimmer of pink.

Hercules's mind was racing faster than Apollo's chariot. He would have to ask Xena about it when he got a chance. In the mean time, he wondered what that son of a bacchae brother of his was doing. He had been warned not to confront his brother until he had worked out some of this situation and his anger. _Gods know how Zeus could make this one worse, though. _He let out a heavy sigh and made a portal appear in front of him. He saw Ares walking at high speed and a wary Iolaus trying to keep up. Hercules watched his best friend and sighed. _Be careful, Iolaus._

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	4. Walking a Mile

Chapter 4: A Mile in His Shoes

Chapter 4: A Mile in His Shoes

Iolaus sat up watching the body of Hercules sleep on the other side of the campfire. Ares had been particularly warring today. Not that he had expected Ares to be decent company, but still, it was a far longer day then he would have preferred. Iolaus surveyed their camping supplies from his spot on his bedroll. _Looks like we'll need more water._ The hunter sighed to himself; tomorrow would probably be as bad as today, if not worse. He had the suspicion that Ares would try to sneak out early in the morning in an attempt to get away. Iolaus glared at the sleeping form. _You won't get away that easy, Ares. Until this whole thing is cleared up, I'll be on your back like… um, leather. _He made a face at his own disturbing simile. He would have to come up with something better if he was going to sound intimidating to the former god of war. The best he could do, the hunter decided, was to be prepared to move out as soon as he woke up. _Guess I'll feel the canteens now. _Holding in his tired groan, he forced himself to his feet to make the short trip down to the stream.

Iolaus walked tediously down to the stream, trying to be extra careful not to wake up Ares. As he made his way through the wooded area, a flash of blue light blinded him. Momentarily stunned, Iolaus was relieved to see the body of Ares staring back at him, smiling. "Herc! Is that really you?" Iolaus hoped this wasn't a trick.

Hercules smiled, "Yes, of course. How are you? How's it going with Ares?"

Iolaus made a sour face. "Well, it's no picnic. He's been walking across Greece faster than a hestian priestess from a love-starved satyr."

Hercules patted his friend on the shoulder. "I'm sorry. Thanks for doing what you can though. What has he got planned?"

Iolaus scratched his head. "I don't know. I mean, I've tried to talk to him about what he think we should be doing, but he insists he knows someone that will help him. He won't say who or where we are going to, so I just try to keep up."

Hercules gave a sympathetic smile to his exasperated friend. "Well just keep and eye on him and call me if you need me."

Iolaus, thinking Hercules was going to try and make an exit, immediately added "Woah, well, you're not off the hook yet. Where have you been all day?"

Hercules gave him a tired smile. "I have been on Olympus. I have been receiving tutorials on how to be war god." Hercules paused to roll his eyes. "I would have been here sooner, but I was told that Zeus would make things even worse if I came here and got into another fight with Ares."

Iolaus nodded. "Well, hey, this is it. Our big opportunity, or your opportunity rather, to fix it. Hercules, as god of war, you can create peace!"

Hercules nodded affirmatively. "I don't plan on wasting this chance, Iolaus. Tomorrow I am going to talk to some warlords about calling off their attacks."

Iolaus beamed at his friend, "Then this may be worth it after all."

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Ares peaked out from the bedroll he currently occupied. The sun was just below the horizon, and more importantly, the annoying sidekick was still in Morpheus's realm. He got up slowly, trying to be as quiet as possible. He gathered the few belonging he thought he may need, a canteen, a roll of bread, and oh, Iolaus's sword. He laughed at his own devious plan. _Now to get to Corinth, to get to Xena._ His face softened at the thought of the warrior. Her blue eyes, her beautiful smile… his thoughts drifted. At least as a mortal he would have an opportunity to be close to her for a while. He sighed. _Seeing Xena, now there is a reason to get up in the morning. _He spared one last look at Hercules's "little buddy," gave a mock salute, and headed off into the dawn.

Unbeknownst to Ares, Iolaus waited until the former god has exited their campgrounds then got up and started after him.

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Hercules looked at himself in the mirror in Ares's palace on Mount Olympus. He practiced his best angry Ares imitation. Hercules admitted that he definitely looked the part when he put forth the effort. Satisfied that he could be a convincing Ares, he disappeared to visit the warlord Thalus.

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Ares walked on the well-traveled road to Corinth. He had been aware that Iolaus was following him for quite sometime now, but chose to ignore it. _So long as he is back there, I don't have to here his incessant remarks about everything._ Iolaus had been trying to close the distance between them for a while, but every time he gained any ground, Ares walked faster.

Suddenly Ares hairs stood on end. Ahead of him, he saw a group of traveling priestesses. He noted that there robes where that of Gaea's, his grandmother. He looked at the elderly priestesses walking at a moderate pace away from Corinth. "_What is missing,_" he thought to himself. _"Something is making me…" _and then he grinned he realized what was triggering this feeling. He drew Iolaus's sword and made his way to the priestesses.

From behind him, Ares heard a loud "NO!" being shouted from Iolaus, as the blond started running at full speed to catch up with him. Ares didn't dignify the action with even so much as a glance, and he continued his stealthy approach. He felt a hand grab his shoulder.

"Ares, what on earth are you thinking? You can't seriously want to mug these old priestesses! What has gotten into you?" Iolaus stared at the former god incredulously.

"You idiot. I'm not after the priestesses. I have my own, remember?"

Iolaus didn't have time for a snappy comeback as he suddenly became aware of the bandits approaching from all directions. "Five from the left." He said, trying to prepare himself for the onslaught.

"Yes, and three from the right, two from behind and one in the tree."

Iolaus gave Ares a surprised look. Iolaus was obviously taken aback by Ares still having any abilities without his godhood. The shock wasn't long lived, as the bandits made their move and attacked. The two men stood back to back as the renegades attempted to dispatch them. _Who would have ever imagined me and Ares fighting back to back? _If the situation hadn't been so serious, Iolaus doubted he would have survived the laughter the image brought up.

Ares was the first to get into the action as the men saw him as the bigger threat. They came in slowly and tauntingly, clearly not expecting the fight they were about to encounter. "Here, you'll need this back," he said as, too Iolaus's great surprise, he gave Iolaus back his sword after taking out the first two men.

Ares and Iolaus made short working of the outlaws. The priestesses were very grateful and swarmed the two men with thanks and praise. The two men tried to get out of the crowd, saying it was no problem. The priestesses would have liked to stay and praise them more, but said they had to make it to the temple by noon. Iolaus wished them a safe trip on the rest of their journey.

Iolaus smiled and turned to Ares. "Well, I have to admit, I didn't think you had it in you."

Ares raised an eyebrow. "Well, don't get to cocky. I didn't do it for the priestesses. I needed the exercise."

Iolaus patted his traveling partner on the shoulder. "Come on, let's hit the road." He turned and began walking towards Corinth.

Ares paused. "Hit the road? Yes, let's." With that he strode up behind Iolaus and knocked him unconscious. Ares looked at the sidekick lying in a pile on the ground. At first he began to walk off, but turned back. Checking for other travelers and seeing that the road was clear, he pulled the sidekick off the road and under the shade where he would be safe until he woke up. He placed the sword and traveling supplies next to the hunter, then took off towards Corinth.

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Hercules appeared in main tent of Thalus's army. He was not surprised to find that the man ordering everyone around was a greasy, hairy thug. He chose not to reveal himself at first, and he watched with interest the plans that the warlord was making. _I need just information to make sure he believes me. _He heard what town they were to be invading and the methods of sacking the village. Hercules cursed under his breath. He couldn't believe the nerve of this guy. _What gives him the right to take what isn't his?_ Hercules chose this moment to make himself visible.

"Enough!" Hercules commanded.

"Lord Ares, what a surprise! Thank you for granting us your presence as we plan for our upcoming battle. May we honor you with our service." Thalus took a bow before the war god.

"There will be no upcoming battle. I want you and your men to call it off and go home."

"What?" There was a pause from Thalus, and then he began to laugh. "My lord, that is a funny joke. The men and I appreciate your humor. Now, if we can get your opinion on our plans.."

"This is not a joke. Do you see me laughing?" Hercules leaned across forward wear he was face to face with the warlord. Thalus saw no amusement in the god's eyes.

"But, the men, they have no home to go to if they don't bring back money. I can't disperse them." Thalus looked on incredulously.

"I have spoken. Take your men and go home, or face my wrath." Hercules disappeared in a violent explosion of blue light.

Thalus was stunned and looked around the tent at the other men. "He's lost his mind. If Ares doesn't want us to sack this village, we won't, but we will take another in its place. Come on men, let's get to work."Thalus and his men began getting prepared to take on the next closest town.

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Hercules smiled triumphantly as he reappeared in the halls of war. This peace thing was easier than he thought it would be. He would be a fantastic god of war.


	5. Intersections

Sorry the update took so long… I have it planned out (mostly) but it takes a little bit for me to try and get around to writing. Thanks for your patience and your reviews! You guys are awesome!Abby

Chapter 5: The Intersection

Xena smiled inwardly as the massive gates of Corinth welcomed her presence. She tried to keep a straight face as she noticed the guards trying to look more impressive as she passed them on top of her horse. _"Oh how quickly things change… not long ago, those soldiers would have done anything to keep me on the other side of those gates…" _Her mind traveled back several years, back to a time when all Corinth's citizens would have taken up arms against her. She could still smell it, taste ii, the fear and turmoil that had surrounded her. She remembered the men, her men, doing her every bid as she worked tirelessly over her battle plans. It all came flooding back, standing there, leaning over the table in her tent—a tent fit for a conqueror. She shuddered at the word conqueror. _But still, it wasn't all about power, even then…_ Her mind moved forward several hours to the night she had been recalling. She remembered the tingle run through her and she had known he was there. And when he appeared… she stopped herself suddenly. _"Those are dangerous thoughts, Xena." _She berated herself silently. She thought about how he had looked at her, his brown eyes filled with something… adoration? affection? It was hard to tell. _"One can never be sure when dealing with the god of war."_ She reminded herself. _"Too much has changed… there is no use thinking of what can never be." _

She looked ahead and saw a courtyard dedicated to the current ruler of Corinth. As the focal point, there was a larger than life statue of Hercules's brother Iphicles. She noted how at its base there were many gracious offerings of flowers and coins to their lord. Xena looked around the town, as the many citizens went about there daily routines and smiled. _"I'm glad you got the ruler you all deserved." _With that last thought on the subject, she renewed her focus at finding an open blacksmith and the Golden Fleece Inn.

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_"And then, with a mighty thrust, the villain lay slain, a victim of his own vice… Yea.. Wait, Or maybe.. with a thrust of such might, the victor voraciously vanquished the villain via their vice." _The blonde bard giggled to herself. _"Maybe I will stick to the first one…" _Gabrielle paused to shift her pack from one shoulder to the other. She sighed. _"Of course, Xena… I will meet you in Corinth. Oh no, don't worry, I know it's far but I don't mind the walk. No, you take Argo. I'll be fine." _She mentally kicked herself while recalling the last conversation she had with her best friend. The trip had been utterly exhausting. She had made a trip back to see her sister, Lila, whom had gotten engaged to a neighboring farm boy in Potedia. The wedding had been beautiful and would have been peaceful had it not been for her family's attempt to spice up her love life. They had decided to hook her up with the nice young gentleman they met at the only tavern in town. She rolled her eyes thinking at the disaster that had been. The poor guy had never even heard of an amazon! She smiled recalling the shock on his face when she came strolling up to him, staff in hand. _"Like he was seeing a three-headed dog! Oh well, the important thing is that Lila is happy." _Secretly, Gabrielle had always hoped Lila would come and join her and Xena on an adventure. She had wanted much more for her sister, more than the life of a simple villager. Before she could continue, her thoughts were interrupted by a rustling sound. As quickly as it came, the noise vanished without a trace. She moved her staff to a more defensive position as she tried to locate the source of the disturbed foliage. Her eyes narrowed as she tried to take in every thing around her. She didn't sense any people closing in on her, but you could never be too cautious. She looked down at the dirt road she had been following. _"Strange… signs of a skirmish. Looks like two men came from there, and 1, 2, 3, 4…_" She lost count of all the footprints. She turned her head sideways, observing a new set of tracks. _"Drag marks?" _ The bard checked her surroundings again. Not sensing any present danger, she stealthily followed the drag marks to the side of the road. The rustling noise suddenly appeared again, strongly, to her surprise directly ahead of her. Using her staff, she pushed away the light undergrowth that lined the way to Corinth. "Hello?" She called, trying to get a response from what she hoped friendly individual that just happened to get in a skirmish, and then drug off the road. "Heeellllloooooooooo?" The young amazon called again. This time she heard a low groan in response. She saw the source lying under a tree. In the shade, her eyes hadn't adjusted and she couldn't make out anything about the person groaning. She proceeded with caution. "Hello? Are you ok?" Her eyes began adjusting as she heard another groan.

"Yea" came a firm masculine voice. "I'm just, ow.." The man struggled to get up. "I was knocked out and pulled over to…" There was a short pause. "Gabrielle?" Iolaus's eyes widened as he saw the person whom had found him.

Gabrielle could now make out the features of Iolaus. "Iolaus!" she exclaimed as she ran to both embrace and help her good friend. "What happened?" she asked with utmost concern.

"You're not going to believe it.." He gave her a half smile, which quickly grew as he took in the features of her face. "It's a long story…"

The bard smiled broadly. "Those are my favorite kind."

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Ares grimaced as he saw the gates to Corinth in the distance. "_Of all the places she would have to be, it would be here._"He continued his super-human pace towards his destination. The sun was very near setting and he knew they closed the gates at dusk. "_Just a little farther," _he kept telling himself. He wasn't tired, so much as annoyed with his current predicament and impatient with traveling the mortal way. _"This is just ridiculous. Why do mortals even leave their little huts? This trip is taking FOREVER."_ The city was very near when he saw the guard was beginning to close the gates for the night. Ares started off running. "Wait! Wait! Don't close."

On top of the gate, a lone soldier heard his cry. "Halt!" he commanded. "There is someone down there. Light a torch and see who it is!" A guardsman at the bottom did as his superior told him. The guard stepped through a side door to verify the late-comer to the city.

"Why, why it's HERCULES!" The guard declared and a cheer went up in the ranks of soldiers.

Ares heart froze. _"Uhg. Wanna be warrior cheering for Jerkules? Pathetic!" _He continued on with his fast pace. He decided it was in his best interest to play along to get in through the gates. "Yes! It is I! Hercules!"

"He'll want to see the king!" The guardsman declared. "Quick, alert Iphicles! Yes, let's form a party to escort him!"

Ares was glad the twilight would help hide his scowl. "No, no, that isn't necessary. Just let me pass and I will go on my own."

The guard insisted, as did several of his friends. Before Ares knew it, he had been brought in and surrounded by imperial guards for the king. "Wait, no, you've made a mistake! I need to.." Ares could never finish the sentence. As often as he started it, the guards continuously cut him off. Ares was being shuffled through the main square when he saw his chance.

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Xena sighed as she found yet another closed blacksmith shop. By the time she had found the Golden Fleece Inn and gotten Argo settled into the stable, she hadn't found anyone to make new shoes. "Well girl, can't say I didn't try." She moved through the main square trying to avoid drawing attention. It had been a long trip and the last thing she wanted was more trouble, or her luck, trouble and another lost cat. _"I'd take on a warlord any day rather than hunt for lost pets." _She was about to contemplate what that statement said about her when she felt that tingle run through her. She stopped in her tracks. The warrior felt a pair of eyes on here, staring at her back. Xena turned to see the eyes were not the ones she was expecting and that they looked desperately caught in a whirlpool of Corinthian soldiers. She raised an interested eyebrow and grinned when he mouthed the world "Help." With that, Xena sprang into action, pushing her way through the crowded market to come to the aid of the demi-god.

"Wait! Hold on!" Xena yelled, but was drown out by the commotion. "Guards, stop!" she commanded, using her old army voice. The men came to a dead stop in the middle of the marked place. She smiled to herself. _"Still got it." _

Ares smiled as Xena turned to face him in the crowd. He knew they still had a connection, he knew it. He watched helplessly as Xena came to his aid. The men would not listen to him, they were too excited to be pleasing their king. Out of the chaos came a loud, strong command to stop, and to his pleasure, the guards stopped. "_She's still got it." _Ares grinned a cheshire grin. "Hello, Xena."

Xena smiled back, "Hello." She raised an eyebrow waiting for direction. Ares took the hint and started.

"See, as I was trying to tell you, I don't need to go to the palace right now. You see, there is something I have to discuss with some very, very important people right now.. and I'm afraid it is all going to be a bit of a surprise for Iphicles. Now you wouldn't want to ruin something for your king would you?"

The guards shook their heads in a unanimous no.

"Well, then, you won't mind me taking my friend now, would you?" Xena decided to chime in.

"No, no. Of course not ma'am. And don't worry your secret is safe with us. The king 's surprise will not be ruined on our account."

Ares stepped out of the ring of guards and towards the warrior princess. "Well then, thanks for your trouble. Good bye." Ares put on his best phony Hercules smile and looked to see that Xena was also putting on a reassuring façade for the onlookers. The guards wave goodbye and headed back to their post.

Xena turned to look at the supposed Hercules. Her smile was gone and the look she now wore was all business. "What's going on?" The warrior paused, trying to figure out why she sensed Ares but only saw Hercules. "You," she said, "you aren't Hercules." She looked deep into the demi-gods eyes.

Ares smiled broadly. "Ah Xena, never could get anything past you."

She clenched her jaw. "What have you done now?"

Ares smiled and shrugged. "For once, I am merely a so-called victim, in need of some rescuing." He gave her a roguish grin.

She narrowed her eyes. "You've got a lot of explaining to do."

"Yes, my dear, all in good time." Ares paused. "Let's get some place…" he let it draw out as he spoke "…a little more private."

Xena glared at him and did her best to look disgusted. "Let's go."

Ares grinned again. "After you."


	6. Tangents

Chapter 6: Tangents

Disclaimer: It's a long one…. Hope you like it!

Chapter 6: Tangents

Thalus paced around his ornate table and looked down at his abandoned battle plans. _"Go home. Ha, some god of war he is." _Thalus grumbled to himself as he stopped his pacing to look at his map. They had given up the town of Titania, but now which town should they take. He let his eyes wander to the towns surrounding Titania. _"Hm.. Pythos looks nice. Eh.. too close to Athenian territories. Agra? Nah, nothing there to take…"_ He continued looking around the map. If he didn't find a close enough village to sack, his men would mutiny as soon as supplies ran low. He could argue with man waiting for his cut of plunder, but not his share of food. Thalus heard the horn of the watchmen at the side of his encampment. _"This better be good," _he thought to himself as he made to exit his tent.

He saw his scouts approaching on horseback as they galloped full speed to his location. Thalus crossed his arms and waited for them, calmly observing their physical state and their distinct lack of loot. He did not have to wait long, as they were soon dismounting in front of him.

"My liege!" The highest-ranking man spoke first. "We bring news!"

"Yes, news.. but not much else I see.." Thalus gave his scouts a final look over. "This news you bring, is it worth your life?" Thalus let his hand slide over the hilt of his dagger. The soldiers surrounding the tent saw his subtle signal and began closing in on the returned scouts.

The scouts looked nervously from one to another. The highest-ranking man spoke again. "By Zeus's bolt, it is."

"Well, do tell." Thalus gave the leader, Akron, his most menacing look.

"On the way to scout Titania, we heard news that a group of Gaea's priestesses were on their road from Corinth to Orencia."

"Orencia? Priestesses? That was not your command!" Thalus was frustrated. "_When did good help become so hard to find?" _ His hand tightened on the handle of his knife and his surrounding men responded by drawing their weapons.

Akron gulped nervously. "Yes, sir. I know sir. But we had heard they were unprotected and carrying an enormous pay load. King Iphicles of Corinth, they say he donated a fortune to those priestesses to take care of an orphanage in Orencia." Akron's voice had begun to waver.

"Well.. Akron.. do tell me of how you plundered the priestesses to give us such a bountiful fortune." Thalus drew his dagger and his soldiers closed even further in on the now quivering scouts.

"B, b, b, but…" Akron stuttered. "Th, the, the rumors were true, my lord. We watched, they did have a large bounty. It was hidden in their robes. We tracked them for most of the day, my lord, and finally, we tried to take them."

"Beaten by a pack of priestesses? And you call yourself worthy of serving me?" Thalus was beyond furious. "Kill them." He turned his back and was about to walk off when he heard Akron yell, "Wait!"

Thalus turned around. He motioned for his soldiers to halt their previous command. "What is it?"

Akron started again. "The priestesses, they had help from two strangers. They didn't seem to get along.. but they sure knew how to fight. But they are not with the priestesses anymore. The priestesses have returned to their temple. And my lord, these are Gaea's priestesses of Eryth! They guard the Eryth stone!"

"Lower your weapons, men. Akron, come with me into my tent."

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Strife elbowed Discord for what had to have been the hundredth time. "Stop it spaz." Discord said in a harsh whisper. She looked at the other minor god sitting next to her. He gave her a goofy grin and then proceeded to imitate the recently made god of war, who's back was currently turned. Discord glared. She whispered again to him. "Stop it you idiot, the sooner we pretend to care what bozo here is talking about, the sooner we leave."

"I'm sorry, was there something you wanted to ask?" Hercules turned back to face his new pupils. He had decided one of the best ways to make a permanent difference on Olympus was to get through to Strife and Discord. Hercules had been pacing in front of the two for some several hours discussing the new papers he wanted to get authorized by Olympian laws.

"No! I mean, no… I didn't want to. I find all this peace junk, I mean, stuff.. comes very easily to me." Discord smiled sweetly. "Strife has a question though." Her grin turned malicious as she looked at Strife. Strife glared back.

"Yes, Strife?" Hercules tried valiantly to put on his most sincere face. In Ares's body though, it came out more like a smirk.

Strife decided to take the opportunity to stand up. "Well, yes, you see Unc.. I mean, Er, Herc.. is that um." He posed with his hand on his chin as if in deep thought. "I suppose my question was about…." He looked at Discord, who returned a blank stare and a smile that betrayed how much she relished making him look like a fool. His look once again returned to a glare. "Yes, well, um. So, how's about this peace, right? I mean. I see what you said, and wow, like groovy." Strife went slowly forward and put his arm around Hercules's shoulders. "It's like you said, live and let um, live, was it? Like I totally see what you're saying, but here's the thing. Um. Discord said she wanted you to have some one on one training time with her on it, and I guess.. I wanted to make sure that you could do that for her." Strife grinned triumphantly at the dark goddess still sitting on the bench. Discord, if possible, got even paler.

"Training.." Hercules smiled. "Yes, of course. We could definitely do that. Right after we finish discussion this treatise to human rights I am writing." Strife let go of Hercules and skipped back to his seat. Discord elbowed him hard when Hercules turned his back to them.

"I hate you." She whispered with all the anger she could muster. Strife let out an obnoxious laugh and Discord could take it no longer. She leapt from her seat and tackled him.

"Break it up you two!" Hercules walked over and pulled apart the god and goddess. He held them both by the collars of their clothes, high enough off the ground so their feet dangled. The two were still trying to claw at each other, even as Hercules interceded. "Ok, I think it's time we got some fresh air. Come on, let's do that training now." He sat the two immortals down where they crossed their arms and stuck their tongues out at each other. Hercules grumbled to himself about the situation. "Come on, we're going to practice what we preach. We are going to Athens." Hercules put his hands on his minions and they all three disappeared in a blue flash.

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Iolaus smiled and his beautiful companion. It was amazing to see how she had matured in the past few years he had known her. She sat across from him, cooking their food over a small fire. They had decided catching up to Ares before nightfall was a lost cause, so they had set up camp when the sun started to sink over the horizon.

Gabrielle flipped the fish in the frying pan she was holding. She hoped Iolaus would like it, then again, he was bound to like it more than Hercules's cooking. His guide to making food was much like his guide to picking weapons when fighting—just grab what's closest to you and hope it resembles what you are using it for. "_It's a wonder they haven't starved to death."_ She watched the meal carefully. She could feel Iolaus watching her as she cooked, and fought the urge to blush. She looked up and smiled at him. "So this is going to make a wild story, huh? Two life long enemies exchanging places…" She paused to consider the irony of the situation. "Well, even though Hercules didn't deserve this, Ares sure had it coming."

Iolaus laughed. He could tell the amazon had something in particular in mind when she said that. "And why do you say that? I mean, aside from the obvious 'he's a jerk' reason?"

"Iolaus, did I ever tell you about the time Ares switched the bodies of Xena and Callisto?"

Iolaus chuckled, "Now that you mention it, yea you have. That completely slipped my mind." Iolaus laughed harder, "And now you think he must have been on his way to find Xena. He's not the sharpest sword in the armory, is he?"

Gabrielle laughed, "Well, I would never claim he wasn't sharp." Gabrielle made face. "Pig-headed, arrogant, conniving, yes.. but dumb, never."

"What do you think he's planning?" Iolaus looked intrigued.

"I don't know. Probably the same thing he always plans." A worried look passed over her gentle face.

"What's that?" Iolaus wore a troubled expression.

"To get Xena back." The bard looked back towards their fish in the pan.

--

Xena lead "Hercules" back to her inn through all the back alleys using all the covert methods at her disposal. They had not said a word to each other since she had rescued him from the guard. She looked back at him for the tenth time to make sure he was keeping up. He grinned a mischievously at her. Xena returned the look with one of annoyance. So many questions ran through her head _"What did he do this time? Why did he come find me? Would it be too noticeable if I knocked that smirk off his face?" _After their short trek, the inn was insight. She took Ares around to the back entrance, to avoid another awkward 'hooray Hercules' situation. Ares followed her quickly up the back stairs and into her room. As soon as Xena got the room securely locked she spun around to see Ares stretched out seductively on her bed. He patted the bed next to him, motioning for her to sit next him. Xena snarled and moved to sit on a chair across the room from him. "So, are you going to spill it, or what?"

Ares laughed, "I see patience is still not one of your many skills."

"And I see staying out of trouble is not one of yours." Xena scrutinized. "What are you doing here, Ares? How did you get in Hercules's body? May I presume he is in yours?"

Ares raised an eyebrow and lay there, still smiling at her. "Presume away, my dear."

Xena gave Ares a cold look. "Look, you came to me. I assume it's because you want something and if I'm going to help you, I want answers. Now Ares."

He raised his hands in a sign of truce. "Ok, I give." He took a deep breath. "So, daddy dearest decided to break up this um, 'dispute' that Hercules and I were having. And then he gets this bright idea that we just need to understand each other better…"

"So he traded your lives.." Xena finished his sentence in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Basically, yea." Ares moved to were he was sitting on the edge of the bed.

"So why are you here, now? What makes you think I'll help you?" Xena tilted her head and waited for his response.

The smile slid from Ares face and he looked down at the ground. Xena could tell he was thinking about it. Ares looked up at her "Because, I knew you would. You understand what I do, like no other mortal could. That and I knew I could trust you to do the right thing." He shrugged. "Especially when your buddy Jerkules is on the line."

Xena nodded solemnly. Then, despite herself, a small smile crept on to her lips. "Being mortal any better this time?" Ares made a sour face, and Xena just had to laugh. Some of the tension being broken, she got back to business. "So, what exactly did you have in mind?"

Ares gave her a charming grin, knowing that the deal was sealed when she had laughed. "I don't know. I was thinking I could partner up with your for awhile. I figure that's what dad wanted, and until we find a loop hole, it would be best for me to just go along with what Zeus said." Xena looked at him like he was speaking like the Jappa do. He could tell she has still trying to process everything he had said, so he sat silently, waiting for a reaction. And then it came.

"What?! Ares, I already have a partner!" Xena sounded exasperated.

"Who? That irritating blonde? Bleh." He made a disgusted face, which he could tell from her expression, she did not appreciate. "Come on, Xe. We always made a great team."

Xena made an indistinguishable noise of annoyance and frustration. "Ares, how long is awhile? I can't have you tagging along, messing things up as we try to fix them."

"What, you don't think I can do it? Look, I thought you would have liked this. See, I help you, you keep me out of trouble, then presto, I get my godhood back."

"So you couldn't find any loop holes?" Xena inquired, with a twinge of desperation in her voice.

"Would I be here if I did?" It was Ares's turn to look annoyed.

She rolled her eyes. "That is not the point."

Ares stood up and walked behind her. He put his hands on her shoulders and began to gently rub them. "Come on, Xe. Give it a chance." He paused. "If you can think of a different option, I'm all ears." He paused again, then leaned over closer to her ear to whisper seductively, "Well, not all ears." She stood up and turned to face him, not looking as amused as he did.

Xena contemplated the options she had before her. Honestly, what choice did she have? Let him go raiding the countryside, thereby forever trapping Greece's best hero in the counterproductive job of god of war? She looked hard into the demi-god's eyes, and was amazed to find that despite being in another body, they were one hundred percent Ares's. She gave him a lopsided grin. "Keep your hands to your self, Ares, and we'll give it a try." She paused and turned to walk to her satchel. "Your going to have to wear this while we're in town." She pulled out a long grey cloak. She tossed it to him and he easily caught it. "Come on, let's go to dinner." Ares smiled and quickly put on the cloak. Xena went to lead them out of them room, but stopped in her tracks. "Wait, one last thing, what did you do with Iolaus?"

Ares laughter filled the room.


	7. New Shoes

Chapter 7: New Shoes

Spoiler Alert: There are references to the Hercules's episode Ares. If you have not seen it, a synopsis is available at

Chapter 7: New Shoes

Hercules led Strife and Discord through the crowded assembly of the Athenian senate. As they went, they listened to what the conversations around them were about. Some talked of peace and others of claiming new territories to the north, between Athens and Corinth. The three gods remained invisible as they spied. When Hercules deemed they should intercede, they would inspire new ideas of peace in the minds of the people around them. Strife and Discord hadn't had such a terrible time since Zeus forced them to do charity work at Aphrodite's temples for ruining Aphrodite's favorite statue. They were just trying to play along so that the ordeal would be over with sooner. While Hercules was busy, Discord leaned over to Strife whispering, "He'll pay for this. We will be back to fix all this later." Strife muffled a laugh.

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Xena loved this time of day, right before the sun rose, when everything was still quiet. She had decided to get an early start on her blacksmith search. She had found a farrier that promised they could make shoes quickly. Xena had been surprised to see that the only blacksmith already at work this morning had been a woman. Leaving Argo in the smith's capable hands, the warrior had gone to the barn to do her morning drills. The drills were successful in keeping her mind engaged and off the subject of her new traveling companion.

Xena sighed to herself as she finished the last maneuver. _"Do I really have to go back to the inn?" _This whole thing with Ares made her uncomfortable. For starters, they were still wedged somewhere in between archenemies and old friends, which was awkward enough. Then there is the fact that he always comes on to her, which was usually flattering if not seriously tempting, but is currently just creepy. He had always been, what was the word, flirtatious? "_But having his words come out of Hercules's mouth…" _Not that she had anything against dear old Herc, as he was one of her closest friends and much revered by her, but it was definitely freaking her out. _"Doesn't he see how awkward that is?"_ Part of her thought Ares was just trying to get under her skin, another attempt to rattle her cage. She did not want to admit it, even to herself, that she missed seeing Ares in his true form. "_Probably for the best that he isn't himself though.." _Being around Ares just brought up too many conflicting emotions. _"That hair, those eyes…" _At least she knew her resolve would not waver while he was trapped in his current form.

Her mind drifted back to the night before. Once she had told him to keep his hands to himself, he had been a charming gentleman. And while Xena would never admit it to anyone else, she had quite enjoyed his company. She still couldn't help but think his being here was a ploy to get something else though. "_Nothing with Ares is ever that simple."_ She smiled to herself, "_At least he will get a first hand lesson on what it's like to have your body traded for your enemies." _A dark thought crossed her mind as she thought about how she could get even with him for what he did with Callisto in her body. He was lucky she was willing to take the high road.

Xena had been walking as she thought about her predicament. She found that she was already back at the inn where she had left Ares. She made her way up stairs to their room and found that he was still sound asleep on floor. He looked so peaceful that it was almost hard to wake him. Almost. "Rise and shine, Ares." He just grunted and pulled his cover tighter. "Ares. Now, get up."

He peaked his head out and opened a single eye. "What?"

Xena crossed her arms and looked down impatiently at him. "Come on, get up."

"But Xena.." he whined.

"We've got things to do. Come on, you're going with me to get Argo. Then we are going to make sure you didn't do any permanent damage to Iolaus."

He grunted again. "Bah, Blondie is fine." He scowled at her, but then made an attempt to get up. "So what else are we doing today?" He stood up and stretched.

Xena watched him get up, letting no emotion show on her face. "Then _we_ wait for Gabrielle." She kind of liked saying 'we.'

"Two blondes? Two irritatingly chatty over zealous blondes? Oh give me a break." He looked at her sharply. Her facial expression did not change. So he did his best to look pouty. Xena felt a tug at the edge of her lips towards a smile. Ares saw it, and immediately his pout became a grin. Ares stretched again and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He turned to face the large mirror and then used it to examine his princess too. Ares lost his grin._ "When she smiles, does she smile at me or him?" _ His concentration on the question was broken, when he found himself suddenly engulfed by the large grey cloak. "Very funny, Xena." He turned to cast her a dirty look for throwing it at him, but found her dazzling smile too hard to resist.

"Come on, let's go." Xena put her hands on her hips to stress that she was growing impatient.

"Ok, ok.. We're going." Ares covered himself with the cloak, and then followed her out the door.

Xena led the groggy Ares outside. She shot him a dirty look as she heard him mutter something about demanding women. Having successfully gotten her attention, he let a smile sneak on to his face, which was barely discernable from under the hood of his cloak. She saw it and rolled her eyes.

He followed her through the winding corridors to a brightly colored stand whose sign read 'Smith Miss.' Ares made a face at the tacky name and the even tackier decorations, but looks from Xena made him drop the attitude. As they walked through the entrance, they did not find the farris. Xena decided to have a look in the back, while Ares preferred to browse the merchandise. Ares walked around the shop taking in the weapons around him. '_Well, they are not Hephaestus's quality.' _Ares turned when he saw another figure enter the room. The figure was a blonde woman, clad in a very modest blue dress, who looked utterly shocked to see him. Ares managed a half-smile, "I am sorry if I'm intruding… I was just examining your merchandise." The woman walked closer, like she had never seen a man before. Ares half-smile faded into a worried look, as he watched how closely this woman was coming to him. Ares started to back away slowly, but she kept coming closer. Ares stepped a larger step back and he realized there was no more room to retreat. Her brown eyes were locked on to his as she stalked him into his corner.

"It's been too long," said the farrier as she neared him. She made a quick glance around and ripped off her blue dress revealing armor. Ares felt his eyes trying to jump out of his head as he saw the woman's armor that showed off her overly muscled body. As she pushed him up against the wall, Ares did the only thing he could think of—call for Xena. "Xe, Xeeenna!?" The blonde stepped back from him, obviously insulted by his actions.

Xena came storming up from the back ready to lecture Ares about whatever mess he had gotten himself into this time, but stopped short. When she reached them, Xena's face went pale and she felt like she was going to be sick. _"Pull yourself together, Xena." _Ares's eyes were on her, hoping she would remedy the situation and not hurt him. Xena glared back at him, and the back of the blonde blacksmith's head. The blonde farrier that was still unaware of her presence… Still unaware of her presence and still trying to molest Ares. Xena cleared her throat, loudly.

The blonde turned around quickly, "Oh, I'm sorry." She turned to Ares, "Excuse me, I have a customer."

Xena had a very unamused expression on her face. Her glare once again returned to Ares, who shrugged and stepped away from the blonde and made his way over to Xena. "Yes, we were here to pick up my horse."

The blacksmith looked confused. "We?" She looked at 'Hercules.' An embarrassed expression replaced the confused on. "Oh. I'm so sorry Hercules. I didn't know."

Xena looked at Ares. "You told her you were Hercules? You are such a.."

Ares held up his hands in defense. "Woah. Stop right there. I didn't say anything. She must really know Hercules. And pretty well too, considering the dress ripping." He winked at the blonde, who was now starting to fume with anger. A sly grin replaced the look of innocence he had had. "Though, I can't say I'd be surprised if, even in this do-gooders body, I couldn't get a lady to drop her dress in under five minutes." He smiled, as Xena's response was to give him her infamous 'look.' Xena opened her mouth to say something but was cut off.

"Now wait a minute! What in tartarus is going on?" The blacksmith pushed her way between the feuding pair. She turned and faced Ares. "If you're not Hercules, who are you?" She looked towards Xena. "And who are you?" The woman turned to size Xena up.

"_That bastard is enjoying this."_ Xena crossed her arms across her chest and put all of her weight on one foot. She shot a very annoyed look at Ares, who was putting on a bit of a show at checking out the scantily dressed blonde to get a rise out of Xena. "The name is Xena." She motioned towards Ares. "And despite how he looks, he is not Hercules." Ares shrugged as the blonde looked back at him.

The farris looked angry and got right up in Ares face. "Who are you, and how did you get in his body?"

Now it was Ares's turn to look mad. Suddenly, his thoughts about how funny it was to see Xena jealous were clouded by his ego. _'Nobody demands anything of me. Insolent mortal.' _

Xena realized if she didn't intercede, things were going to get ugly. Xena rolled her eyes. _'Well, uglier than it already is.' _"He's Ares."

The blonde looked shock. "The god of war?"

Ares glared at her and did not respond, so Xena answered for him. "Yep. Now, who are you?"

"Atlanta."

"Well, Atlanta, it is a really long story as to how things got they way they are now. All that is important is that you know we are trying to fix it. So, if you don't mind, I'd like to get my horse and go." Xena held up her dinars.

"Wait." Ares started to chuckle to himself. "Wait, aren't you that one that they got to make all those swords for that kid army or whatever?"

Atlanta fixed a dark look on Ares. "You would know, you bastard. You almost got them all killed!" She moved to grab the front of his yellow shirt.

At the sign of threat, he laughed even more, but then he glanced up at Xena. Xena stared incredulously at him. "What is she talking about Ares? You tried to make an army of kids?"

He shook his head. "What? No, I didn't do anything. That was Strife or Discord… I don't know which… They are always coming up with the most ridiculous.."

"But we saw you!" Atlanta insisted. "You had these great big glowing eyes!"

Ares made a face. "What?"

"Yea, you were a giant! And Hercules had to fight you…"

Xena raised an eyebrow at the 'giant with glowing eyes' imagery.

"No, that was that crazy grow-bot or whatever they were calling it… Nah, that wasn't me. Must have been Strife. Not even Discord would have used that stupid thing. Besides, an all kids army lacks a certain appeal for Discord.."

Atlanta was not satisfied with the explanation. "I don't believe you!"

"Look you two, as fun as this all is, I'd really like to get going." Xena put on her all business face.

Atlanta could tell that the warrior's patience was wearing thin and that Ares was not going to cave anytime soon. "Fine, we'll get this over with." She took the money and led them to the back where Argo was. The three stood there not talking as Xena examined the shoe work.

Xena's face softened somewhat. "It's a good job. Thank you."

Atlanta just nodded. Ares just stood there looking cocky.

Xena gave Atlanta and awkward thankful nod and then motioned for Ares to come with her. They were about to leave from the stable in the back, when Atlanta called for them to wait. "Wait, if you need anything, ya know, for Hercules's sake, I'd be more than willing to help."

Xena heard Ares mutter, "Yea, I bet you would," under his breath. Xena gave her most reassuring smile. "Thank you, I'll keep that in mind." With that Xena and Ares walked away from the blacksmith's, leaving Atlanta to go back to work. Xena walked ahead, her hand guiding Argo by the reigns. Ares trailed shortly after her. Xena was refused to look back and dignify his presence.

Ares short-lived triumph of making Xena envious was turning around him. He could not help but wonder what she was really jealous about, or rather whom she was jealous over. Ares watched Xena, the way she was walking, and the way she did not acknowledge him. He knew he was in for it now. He cursed inwardly at Zeus and this predicament. Regardless of how well he and Xena got along, he could never get close to her in this body. _"Like being between Scylla and Charybdis.."_ Ares looked pulled his cloak around him tighter. He looked at the barely risen sun as they walked back to their inn. _"This is going to be a long day."_

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End file.
